if i only knew what regret meant

yes, you're just listening to my boring rants

Thursday, February 16, 2006

passion becoming pressure

went back for MJ classes finally after all the external interruptions. kinda nervous initially cos i haven been back for so long, dunno how the pple wud treat me but it turned out pretty fine tho. thanks melissa, david, wayne, ruifen and stephy!

so we proceeded as usual with me trying desperately to catch up on the steps i missed, wasnt too bad too. the drama came jus before pat arrived. apparently they were planning on joining this danceworks competition but there were some screwups so pat was kinda pissed. something happened which i shldnt elaborate further here but kuan nee left the studio and came back with eyes all red and teary. plus stephy ended up crying too.. yea, tt sucks..

so practice went on despite this, was fun and enjoyable.. finally getting back the feeling of why i joined in the first place - passion. got to partner stephy and was pretty jittery cos i haf always seen her as one of the better junior dancers. ended up alright at the end tho' *phew*

now comes the drama. danny was explaining to us another competition that NUS was organising and kuan nee was like trying to get us juniors to join but seems like everybody has their fair share or workload and didn really want to join. gawd then they started to put the pressure on us, psycho-ing us. tink stephy cudnt take it again n broke down again. heard from ruifen after the discussion tt stephy's gonna quit MJ. really depressing news for me cos it means we're gonna lose another good dancer. they are damn hard to come by in NTU these days.

so stephy if u're reading this, i really hope tt u'll stay on. it'll all be over soon. dun let the pressure get to u babe. we all haf times like this, jus hang in there.

astrocow
23:57


I am an object lost in space
I am fear without a face
I am future without meaning
I am helping without feeling

I am twisted and deranged
I am alone in this cage
I can help if help need be
But there's a monster inside of me

He fights for freedom and control
There's a monster in my soul
Leave me without knowing why
Or run the risk of losing your life

I'll care for you, wipe away your tears
And scare away your darkest fears
For darkness is my dearest friend
And with it all my time I spend

Left all alone in my cage
Anger gives its way to rage
I fight for freedom and control
From the monster in my soul

I am weak for I always lose
Madness the escape I choose
If you should meet me on the street
Know insanity is what you'll greet

Stay not long within my presence
For it'll strike you with a vengeance
Then we both shall slip down the slope
The slope of madness without hope


welcome to my humble abyss




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